Wednesday, November 17, 2010

finally exam is passed!

OH MY GOD....
i was so happy when they said this when KAT 141 exam : "Masa sudah tamat. sila berhenti menulis jawapan. kami akan mula mengutip kertas jawapan anda."
it's meas my 1st year 1st sem 1st time examination in USM is officially ends.

exam is a nightmare for me.
i cant sleep well, i cant eat well, i'll be abnormal and i'll getting crazier and crazier as the secondhand is ticking, it's taking all my time!!!

wake up in the morning, after the breakfast, 1st place i go is library.
before close my eyes, the last things i do is close the book.
i was so unhealthy when the study week. i was lack of exercises, lack of nice foods and what's killing me was sitting in front of the books...

an hour before the exam started, i was lying on my bed and kept telling myself : "relax.... relax... take a deep breath and you will feel better."
without 10 mins, i jumped out from my bed and turning the pages.
i think my roommate sure cursing me in his heart. because of me, he also getting nervous.

when answering the questions, my brain blank. NOTHING!!! i calmed myself, kept on writing something on the paper. is it answering the question? i dont care, as long as something comes out.... i was struggling when picking which questions i should answer and each questions is so easy and so difficult to me. i dont know how to pick.....

AND YES!!!! it's over.....

it's means next sem will starts soon... the 2nd sem exam will starts in no time....

Sunday, October 31, 2010

finally, PALAPES orientation ends!!!

we were discussing the strategy to play the what "pisang" game...

i was singing... the branch actually is my mic, T_T

we were doing the front roll. my dear friend, Kin, i think she was too dizzy to roll and sat there laughing.... hahaha....


Gempar Wira!!! GO GO GO!!!

Amir, please eat all the flour. i don't want get any of it on my handsome face...... lol....

i just realize that i'm white!!!




frankly, it was quite relaxing when i was in the water. although the water is quite dirty, but i was too lazy and too tired, i just laid my body inside the water and relax....

instead of doing the kissing postures like my friends did i just want to pass the grass faster to Zul... conclusion, i'm not a romantic person....


Hilmi and me.... Man, right?!

see? i was on the top of the wall. the wall is 12m height, you know. until now, i still feel so proud of myself. ;-p

actually i still got a lots of photos, but i just upload some of it in here. all of them are in the Tuan Erpi's photo album. almost 600 photos there, you can have a look there. now, i feel aches from every parts of my body... Oucch....

Monday, October 25, 2010

it's that time again, written by miss Tan KL

can't take it i can't take it i can absolutely not take it!
the 'force/area'.
tak boleh tahan.

nothing feels right,right now...
you'd think you get it,
the theories,the methods to solve problems
but then when you take another look at your texbook/notebook/reference book.
foreign.

as much as i like writing things down,
i hate long winding passages.
k.i.s.s.
it that so hard too do?
the more you explain,
the more confuse us student gets
the worst part is,
when you don't understand it,brought it to your lecturer,he/she takes a look at it,and tells you it's ok,you don't have to know it,
or,
criticizes your level of understanding of the text,
this should be easy for you to get it, you're a chemistry student.
(well i guess there is still the chance where the lecturer is nice and willing to explain it word by word to you,but i'm feeling passive today,so bear with me)
.
you can't untangle the knots whichever way.
augh..i hate pages with millions of words.
.
tests,
tomorow,the day after tomorow, thursday.
when i list it down this way it seems less intimidating..
'three days ni mah...it's ok wan..ban ban lai..'
but it's the stress that you get,
knowing that YOU are the one that will be sitting in the exam hall..
all alone..
and all you have with you are your calculator, 2B pencil, eraser, blue ball pen, correction tape, ruler.
and the question paper.
.
it's like a devil in disguise
that few sheets of A4.
.
suddenly the phrase 'you may begin now' sounds like a death sentence.
*chop*
.
you have no time to think,
no time to breathe.
no time to swallow you saliva.
no time to shiver from the cold temperature.
.
silence.
the hall looks completely still as everyone tackles the make-believe problems.
the only movement you see is the moving of our hands.
scribbling down the formulae
punching the buttons on the scientific calculators.
.
once in a while,
a couple of them flips the sheets of paper front. back.
shit.
someone finished solving the first page,and is moving to the next 5questions.
.
question number10.
15minutes since the war began.
45minutes to go.
.
question 16.
stuck.
you dilemma.
should i skip this question and come back to it later?
but if i continue to search for the solution in my head, i know i'll find the way.
skip.
or continue staring at it?
tick.
tock.
tick.
tock.
tick.
.
10 more minutes left.
4questions still unanswered.
you're tired.
exhausted like you've never been in your life.
you flip through the 30questions and check if they tally with the shaded circles on the OMR.
back to the same sixteen,empty spots on the OMR.
what should it be.
A. B. C. D.
you clicked on the calculator.
multiply,divide,plus,minus.
hoping somehow a number close to any of the four selections will pop up.
screw the theories.
click. click. click.
.
'times up. please stop writing. please make sure that your IC number is shaded correctly. we will collect your answer papers now'
.
you came out of the hall.
puzzled.
not knowing what the result of your battle will be.
slowly dragging your feet,you head to you bag.
and there's only one thought going through your mind.
'one down. 9more to go.'

Friday, October 22, 2010

tests, quizzes and the final exam

no doubt, they are coming and i have not prepare. where is my weapon? where is my armour? am i sure die in the war??? i taking less unit this sem already. can i manage if i take 21 units next sem???

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

swimming

i love water. our bodies are composed about 60% of water. without water, without life. today i wanna to share my swimming experience in USM swimming pool.


i more prefer if my body traps the water and not the water traps me.

i like my feet are on the solid firm tight earth and not sinking in the water.

i enjoying the wind tenderly touches my face when jogging more than the warm swimming pool water slaps my face.

the feeling of sweats run down from your forehead to the cheeks until the chin.

i even can feel my body is steaming.


swimming is quite suffering for me because my hands and feet is very stiff. i don't know why i can't control them well in the water. i was didn't move at all whenever i want to learn a proper way of swimming. furthermore, i afraid of water. i scare it will stucks my mouth, my nose and my ears. it's very uncomfortable. how to i shout for help if i'm drowning, since i'm full with mouth of water? people surrounded me are so expert in swimming. i was like disturbing their activity. what's the different between an obstacle and me in the swimming pool? i cannot even float on the water....


despite of the cloth problems, i really got no interest in swimming anymore. i seriously told shenq n nan that i won't come back to swimming pool again. however, i learnt how to sink... then, just me sink, sink to the deepest place where everyone can't find me.... then, maybe that time, i really enjoy the time in swimming pool.


Wednesday, October 13, 2010

this morning i'm not in a good mood.

today is Wednesday. yes, Wednesday again. before i join PALAPES, it just another normal day for me. Now, i think Wednesday is quite tortures my mental and my body. i have to wake up damn early in the morning and prepare myself for the "baris pagi".

0500: forcing myself get my butt off from my lovely sweet bed.
0515: Maggie is ready to eat.
0530: bath time
0545: answer the huge call from nature, wearing formal, put some perfume, double check my items, rube the shoes again and again.
0600: in the padang kawal already

because we are not allow to wear watch. so, the following i just describe what is the activities next.

1st, we need an IC squad. if no one want to come out, the inters with post will want us to pumping. the actual number we had pumping i also not sure because the inter 'sesuka hati' wants us to pumping. then, they continue to 'lecture' us and we are in pumping posture. when will stop??? until they feel satisfy and want to check the items.

the items are comb, notebook, handkerchief and a black ball pen. if we fail to bring anyone of these, the punishment will comes. not only this, the shoes is not shinny enough, the handkerchief is not in the same size with the notebook, got some beards and etc, if you get anyone of these, you better prepare to accept the consequences. after these, they trying to find more mistake to get us busy with so called PT ( physical training).

then, our PRK will show up and ask for attendance. they will stop the all the PT and we will do the calling of attendance procedures. later, we will move to side of NAVY. we will take the promises, pray and sing songs. it's not the end.

the PRK will approaches and check on us. this is the 2nd time....
then, he will checks those inter and seniors who have post.
finally, after he brings us some info and v can go back to prepare of the class.

this is the activity i will do every wednesday morning.... i still have to stand with it for 2 and 1/2 years...... T_T

Sunday, October 10, 2010

random~~

actually, i want to write a blog about my life in USM. so far, i have no idea how to tell you all the stories. i don't know how to start and where to start. so, i choose to not to write. what past and let it be past. what is more important are now and future. master what i learnt and conquer problems in future.

you know, i'm not very good in study. however, i'm surrounded by smart people. it's makes me feel so self-abased. i tried hard to study (but lazy to do practices), my result still poorer than them. what's makes me feel worse is the quiz and test. they are the damn strong evidence to prove i'm stupid.

PALAPES activity will stop for awhile to letting us more time to prepare the exam. i'm kinda miss the time we having training. at least, we got something to do, something to enjoy, something to talk about n etc. now, i'm in my room listening to music, doing the exact things when i doing nothing at home.

salut...

Monday, October 4, 2010

regret

the purpose i open this blog is to share my feeling to who really care about me. since i come into USM, i realise that i seldom update my blog already. instead of homeworks and PALAPES activities, i used the time for movies.

that's a lot of things i want to share with you all. that's many stories i want to tell. but don't know y?

maybe i shouldn't open this blog? let it just die like this?

Thursday, September 30, 2010

进来理大不多不少也有两个月了。

我的心情还是一样糟……


不知道为什么?我还不习惯吗?是我太过懒吗?


天啊!!!我想大喊、大叫、狂奔、揍人……


我很想做些我不常做的事。借着这些事去发泄……


突然,超想对某一人狠狠地骂: “屌你!!!!

Monday, September 13, 2010

A Kuantan trip

frankly, i have been to Kuantan several times before. this time, i went to Kuantan because of some people. they are pow lin and li yan, my NS friends. after the PLKN, i didn't meet them for 3 years already. so, when i got a call from li yan and he was asking me would i like to come to Kuantan for a gathering. without second thought, i said yes.

i'm not decided to write where i had gone and what i enjoyed most when i was in Kuantan. i want to tell you all my feeling along this 2 days, 1 night trip.

1st
i was damn worry about the gathering. what if i cannot recognise them, what if i have no topic to talk with them, what if what they are discussing and i'm know nothing about it and etc. i got a thought to take the go-home-bus right after i reach Kuantan.
when i saw them and i didn't feel any awkward when talking with them. it was a surprise for me. i thought i will feel strange when meet them but no. now, i'm feel so glad that i didn't run away. if not, i'm really a cower.

2nd
i feel so uncomfortable when li yan paid all the bills. i know he is a local and he is a very passion guy but he really no need to pay all the bills for us. we are still students. we should share the bill. we have to force li yan to take our money and only this way can makes us feel better. i give all my money inside my wallet (i mean red colour one), although i just got a piece. hope he doesn't mind.

3rd
i want to say thank you to sean, pow lin's boyfriend. he is so friendly and he is a nice guy. the most important he helped me to take a very beautiful photo which i very like it. hahaha

4th
thank you li yan for letting me staying in his house. i like his house very much. his mother's cooking is nice, his relatives are so kind and the list never end. he makes me to feel i am right in my home. after chatted with him, i learnt a lot from him and i get more understanding him. maybe should i call this trip as li yan's house trip??? hahaha

5th
thank you Elizabeth. just a few messages and some calls, she came out and accompany me to watch a damn stupid movie... thank you!!!

AND

THE END


hahahaha.......................

Monday, August 30, 2010

this week i'm going back to hometown

time flies and on this friday i will take bus go back to hometown. this 2 months i enjoy USM's life very much. i join many activities and i meet a lot of friends. assignments and experiments report make me busier. PALAPES activities release my tension a lot.

in USM, sleeping becomes my dream. i hardly got 8 hours sleeping time. normally i just sleep for 5 hours, i even have to scarify my nap. God... when i go back home, 1st time i must do is sleep... hahaha

Monday, August 23, 2010

i'm doing good...

long time din't come here and say hi to everyone. i'm still like the same but lost 4kg already. it's cannot blame on me, who call the bus service in USM is so poor, it makes me walk everyday from lecture room to lecture room.

later, i have to go to fix my PTPTN things. it can be fast and smooth. i skip several classes just for it.

i must rush all the exercises by this week. you know, tests are coming. i don't want to fail any subjects. plus, the holiday is coming. except the stupid WUS assignment, i don't want to bring any assignment go back hom.

it's about the time now. i have to leave. sigh~ still busy like hell......

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

still a busy day

everyday in Uni is so busy. i don't know how the seniors still got time to enjoy the things which they like. i hope i can sleep more than 7 hours already. normally when i'm in home, i can sleep about 8 hours per day. now, it's becomes a dream for me.

PALAPES is quite tiring and it's fun. my friends told me that they sense the Malays are not very friendly with us, Chinese. however, i didn't feel anything. am i too stupid or too naive? what i feel is the Malays are trying to communicate with us and don't know how to be friend with Chinese. maybe in their social life are absent of Chinese. i hope my friends can eliminate those uncomfortable feeling in their hearts. i want 3 of us can join the PALAPES until we graduate.

experiments still a headache to me. You know, there are so many kind of uncertainties surrounding us. our readings are not always correct and a lot of factors are affecting the result. my partner and i try to do our best. the experiments still complex as hell. we still doing it like cow.

this week is convo week. some of the lecture classes are postpone but the tutorial classes still going on. tomorrow i may free a bit and go outside to buy the bus ticket for the Raya holidays. although tomorrow PALAPES need to wake up at 5.30am and gather at 6.20am. then after this activity, i can go back and continue to sleep again. later, i have to rush for my assignments and the notes to be done.

that's all for today. bye...


P/s: the keyboard in library is so slippery, so many germs. i better leave here now and go back use my lappy...

Thursday, July 29, 2010

惊喜

天啊!昨天真的是超惊喜的。你们都知道我是一个很乖,很听话的孩子。就是这样的性格,昨天下课后,我就没事可以做了,就很乖的走进了理发店要剪头发。我都已经是PALAPES DARAT的人了,剪短发也是很应该的吧!

我就很随便地坐上椅子,很轻松地对理发师说,头顶减3号,侧面减2号。反正是学长对我们的吩咐,我也没什么好怕的。哪知道那理发机直扫我的头顶的时候,我立即吓傻了。怎么我的头发这么短的?这是3号吗?这简直是和剃光头没分别啊!我一直和理发师确定这是3号吗?理发师也有点不耐烦了,他直接给我看理发机上的号码。我也无话可说了。我欲哭无泪……

理发师,你可知道你的顾客的心碎了吗???

短短的十几分钟,我的头发没了。和 skin hair 没差。

过后,我回去、洗个澡、睡觉、读下书,然后很自然地出来吃午餐。我看见 bird 很自然地坐在她面前。她看傻了眼,跟着是爆笑。ADUI…………她就一直笑,一直笑……

昨天有几个朋友经过我面前,一个也没认得我……

我无言了。

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Busy days

Life in USM is quite busy. Although the tutorial classes haven't really start, i already crazy.

What i want to share with you all is :
  • Now, i am staying in Indah Kembara, not Cahaya Gemilang already. Because of PALAPES, i got a new n huge room.
  • My KAT 141 lecturer got a heart attack and his class will replace by group A's lecturer. That's means i have to join group A to continue KAT and my class shift from 0900 to 0800. i have to wake up earlier.
  • today my experiment failed. next monday need to go back and re-do again. so, next week, i will have 2 experiment to do because next week got a new experiment.
  • this thursday, i will having a KAT quiz. Its marks is counted. i not really master the chapter 5. what should i do now?
  • this friday and saturday, my school got interaction day. it will be very busy....
  • tomorrow 0630 will have a meeting at PALAPES in formal dress. i have to wake up much more earlier.
  • 2 assignments haven't finish.
i still trying to go jogging at least 1/2 hour per day to improve my fitness. hope i can have more time.....

Sunday, July 18, 2010

like

now, i'm in fajar harapan at my friend's room. because of the stupid "penghayatan lestari", my beautiful Sunday gone. i should sitting in front of my study corner and do some revision. if not, i will become moron.

however, i still like the Uni's life. it gives me so much freedom and yet i have to be more discipline. i have to more independent. i have to take care of my both academic and co-curriculum. i can do my homework, revision and assignment until 2400 and sleep until 0730. i no need to sit inside a same classroom until 2pm. i can go to library anytime and study whatever i like. i can choose go which desasiswa canteen for my meal. i can go jogging or swimming or gym or just doing nothing inside my room.

USM is so beautiful and its compound is not very big. i can go anywhere by walking. sometime i can take bus. it's very convenient to go anywhere i like. it's very to get what i want which the condition is i have enough money.

everyone in here is a friendly. there is no gap between seniors and juniors, lecturer and student. we respecting each other. i like the environment here. "for a sustainable tomorrow" is what the main thing i learn in here. i have to work hard and study hard for save those under billions. like my academic adviser said to me: " don't worry so much about your academic. maintain the CPGA 3.00 and above is ok already. attach more with your soft skill. University still a place which allow you to do mistake. so, do what ever you want!"

i can't tell you how much i love USM within words. In just a couple of weeks time, i fall in love with USM....

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Uni's lfie

so many friends, so many course-mates, so many teachers, lecturers, tutors.... blah blah blah.... but i hardly to remember all of their name.

although Induk Campus is the smallest campus in Malaysia, i already feel very tired walk from a station to another destination. however, i managed i figure out all the bus line. next time it's easier for me to go to classes.

foods here are cheap but not delicious. what to do? i still have to eat.

many friends said me that i'm crazy just because i joined the PALAPES tentera darat. they said it's very hard and will makes me very busy. but what i see who join PALAPES still alive and yet they still take a good care of their academics. hope that i also can manage to do like them. i don't want to follow most of the senior's road as they taken. i want to be different and i have to walk different.

although study is not easy here, but i still trying to catching up. so far so good. but i spent a lot of many on buying books. rm88 for the inorganic chemistry, rm92 for the analytical chemistry, rm50 for the lab manual and rm10 for the english book. rm30 for the lab coat and rm10 for the goggle. i haven't count in the money for eat. sigh....

in here, i have to be more independent. everything has to do by myself. if last time, i go everywhere and do anything with friends. now, most of the time, i'm alone because everyone's schedule is so different. especially on the monday, i just manage to see my roommate when i want to sleep.

from 3rd of july till today 14th of july, i already quite used to this kind of lifestyle. i think the day after these will getting more busy. i don't know will i go back to hometown or not. for now, i'm trying to put all of my concentration on my academic and co-curriculum.

that's what i want to report here... bye, everyone. see you! :-)

Monday, July 12, 2010

finally... the orientation week end!!!!

after i took the bus to Penang, i have no time to write my blog again. thanks to USM for giving us such an unforgettable orientation week. more details i might write it tonight because later i got class. in the evening, i got Ujian Kecerdasan Asas (UKA) and IQ test.


ok la.... bye bye my friends

Thursday, July 1, 2010

last day in mentakab

today is the last day i'm in Mentakab. tomorrow about 10.30pm at Temerloh bus station, i will take my bus depart to Butterworth.

first time, i'm taking bus to a place far far away from my home alone.
first time, i will taking a ferry from Butterworth to Penang Island.
first time, i leave my home sweet home for study.
so many first time will happen by tomorrow. i can't wait till tomorrow. even today i also can't sleep well because i'm too excited already.

frankly. i had a fun last week in Mentakab. although i have to prepare many things for the use of the University but it's only once in a life time, it's worth. i went to a few gathering with my dear friends. after this week, all of us will go different places. it's quite hard to gather again. since secondary school we can meet each other in school or tuition class, for now, only the semester break we can gather. maybe we won't come back to hometown, we will go to play at our new friend's hometown.

future is so unpredictable.... that's why i like about future....

Thursday, June 24, 2010

细碎……

又来爬格子咯!!!

最近窝在家里就要发神经了。我一直都在等 surat tawaran,它让我望穿秋水也看不见它的踪影。很多朋友都受到信了,我的还没来,真的紧张死我了。等信的心情好辛苦哦……

今天邮差没有来,让我傻傻的坐在窗前等他的出现。每当有摩托声的时候,我都竖起耳朵,神经兮兮地转头看门口。看看是否是邮差???

唉……现在我比我家的狗还要尽责看门。它在我脚旁边打呼睡觉,我两只眼睛瞪着门口。我只能说,当我家的狗真幸福!!!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

19/6/2010

昨天个大学录取名单终于出了,我也坐在电脑前面,开着面子书和MSN,不禁地默默为朋友紧张着急。开心的事是看见他们都有被录取,而且都是不错的大学呢!而伤心的事是有些朋友拿不到他们要的科目,而且是八个选择外面的大学与科目。还有些根本没有被录取。唉……

当中很多朋友都被派到去UMUUM。他们可好了,还有一班认识的人可以一起去同间大学。UUM的就有些可怜了。UUM不但离我们的家乡很远,而且还远离最近的城市。真的是三卡拉咯……

UUMUMUSMUMKUDMUteMUTMUPMUMPUKMUMS都有我的朋友。以后大家就各分东西南北啦……不再呆在这小小的文德甲了。各自带着自己的抱负往未来前进。我看只有新年假期和长假的时候,大家才会回来。不过,我看我自己会去大学朋友的家乡玩几天才回家的吧???哈哈哈……

东西都还没准备好呢!文件还没拿去复印,没拿去Sah。衣服还没收拾。唉……我要一个佣人!!!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

倒数中

很奇怪的是不管我做什么很喜欢倒数。这次也不例外,还有十六天我离开开文德甲,去那遥远的槟城读书了。

休息了这么久,我的脑都生锈了,去到那里不知道会不会变成阿呆???
在家这么久,很久都没有用国语和英语,不知道我写功课是会不会“书到用时方很少”???
没有唱国歌这么久,不知道我还会不会唱???
以我这么怪的脾气,不知道又会得罪谁???
我这路痴,不知道要在里面迷路几久???

希望能快快乐乐,有惊无险地过完大学生涯吧!

Monday, June 14, 2010

still left 2 weeks...

2 weeks more i will leave here and go to chase my dream in another states, Pulau Pinang. continue my study for 3 years in Penang sure is a very good experience for me. Now, i can image that i standing at Butterworht bus station and seeking for my way..... sigh!

Friday, June 11, 2010

BBQ at Meng Heng's brother house

最近我很懒惰,也懒得写昨天在明庆家办烧烤会。我只想说,下次我要坐在一旁,翘着脚,什么都不做了。给点东西你们做,哈哈哈!!!!

大合照!!!(明庆捉相机,阿伦回了。 =_=)

TAKE 2

不要露脸的人比我们还要抢镜头…… 哈哈哈

单单光耀就烧三串了!肉丸都是他的。

美女们!Yeah……

不过,都给我拍到丑态。欣薏在发呆烧鸡翼,佩珊也是。阿容再用食物塞嘴巴!哈哈哈!!!

明庆在教明菁烧鸡翼……

明庆在show他的虾,不过虾不熟。

七早八早到明庆家打扫累呆的我……

Monday, June 7, 2010

Bank Account = RM0.00

要命咯!最近,我真的花很多钱!!!现在才来后悔为什么不要在云顶多带些日子,赚多点钱呢?唉……

买衣服、交学费、买电脑、买日常用品、买书和等等,已经用了我不少钱了。我就快要去仆街了!神啊!天啊!掉些钱给我用吧!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

"no tittle"

今天是六月三号 。七月三号呢,我就必须在理大报到了。还有很多东西都还没处理,还有很多书还没温习,我还在这里悠哉的过日子。突然,我觉得很舍不得家。以前我从来都没有这种感觉。很想很想像读中学的时候,每天放学都能回家吃妈妈煮的菜,和家人聊聊天,还有陪我的狗散步,玩耍。还有一个月,我就要离开家了。拿着自己的行李,坐进巴士,向着我的未来前进!

今天我还收到一封简讯。虽然短讯天天收,但这封和其他的不一样。里面包含着不止有友情,还有思念,还有一丝丝的不舍。我何况不是呢?去到槟岛,这么远的地方,回来文德甲的时间又久。我想啊,能在正记聊天的机会又少了……唉!不过,你们能来槟岛,我来做东主,钱由你们付。哈哈哈!!!

还有一个人我必须要言谢的是芊缘。我到槟城可要麻烦她了。麻烦她去巴士站接我,麻烦她载我去大学报到。谢谢!!!(我看要买份礼物答谢了)


Monday, May 31, 2010

USM 理大

二零壹零年五月二十九日,理大的学生录取名单终于出炉了。

二零壹零年七月三日,我就必须去报到了。


Monday, May 24, 2010

噩梦

我又发噩梦了……

这次的噩梦没有鬼、没有妖怪、没有僵尸、没有吸血鬼、更没有变态杀手。只是在我梦中多了几条“咸鱼”。梦不恐怖,但是很诡异。我没有冒冷汗,但百思不解。想睡觉,又放不下它。

『我是一名大戏表演者。我的工作是在台上呈现我最好的歌舞。我还是台柱之一呢!这一次,我接到很奇怪的工作。我们必须在一场冥婚里表演一套戏。我也不知道是什么戏。我们身穿白衣白裤,妆也只有黑白灰三色。

在台上表演时,我才发现男女新人都在台上,都没有放进棺材。它们就放在一片木板上,穿好了华人传统婚衣。我的心突然都凉了。没办法,我也硬着头皮表演。我们前面一名观众也没有。稍远些有一名道士在做法。

我觉得自己很乱,很乱!!!』

就这样,我的眼睛缓缓地开了。转头看下时间,才凌晨两点半……

我也睡不着了……

Thursday, May 20, 2010

medsi interview

today, i woke up at 0500 and 0600 get really to Kuantan for the interview. my father was company me go there but i'm the one who driving. our destination is University Islam Antarabangsa Malaysia. i never been there before and sure got a bit nervous if i cannot get there on time.

after left the highway, i follow the signboards to UIAM. my father kept telling me that in Kuantan won't so easy get lost and we can reach there on time. so, i followed his instructions. unfortunately, he gave me wrong way. the UIAM just besides us and my father said it's not UIAM. some more he said UIAM impossible so near and so easily to find. then, we wasted about 10 minutes to drive around. then, we back to the same place. sighed!!!

UIAM is very very huge. if the guard didn't show me the way to interview place, sure i will lost again. when i reached there, i saw people surrounding me are all Malays. i told myself, never mind, here is UIAM, sure Muslims are the major. after i went to the customer service counter to get more specific direction and went to interview place, i just realised that i am the one and only one Chinese there. Oh My God... 15 persons for room 3, 3 guys and i am the male Chinese. i walked through the waiting corridor and i confirm that i am the only Chinese. =_=

i am the first one to call for the interview.

1st task is colour blind test. for me sure as easy as ABC. i got both car and motor licenses, ok!

the 1st question they asked me : " bolehkah anda cerita tentang latar belakang pendidikan Malaysia?"

i was so "OH MY GOD!!!" my mind was totally blank, BLANK!!! what to do?

i had to answer in BM : " semasa kita berumur 7, kita harus masuk sekolah rendah. sekolah rendah ada sekolah melayu, sekolah cina and sekolah tamil. lalu, kita akan masuk sekolah menengah. dalam sekolah rendah ada UPSR dan sekolah menengah ada PMR and SPM. selepas, SPM, kita boleh pilih pergo belajar kat kolej, matric, form six atau A level."

that moment, i was screaming in my heart " ANYONE PLEASE HELP ME!!! anyone???"

next questions, "bolehkah anda beritahu kami apa itu ozon?"

walao... ozon? apa itu ar, bang????

i answered : " dalam udara terdapat banyak jenis gas. ozon adalah trioxide. blah blah blah..."

i just told them how ozon is form. it's what i study. but i think they are not very satisfy with my answer. (after the 3rd questions, i realise that they actually want the uses of ozone,)

next questions, "apa itu kesan rumah hijau? green house effect."

i answered : " biar saya ambil contoh yang senang faham. macam kereta dalam sinaran matahari tanpa buka tingkap and tanpa buka angin hawa. suhu kat dalam kereta kan sangat tinggi? macam bumi kita, ozon semakin nipis, asap buangan contoh karbon diosikda yang menyerap haba menyebabkan bumi kita semakin panas serta tidak dapat 'cool down' "

finally, i saw they were smiling and node their heads.

after that, they also asked me some common questions like 'why you want to be a teacher?', 'why you are interested to be a teaccher?', 'your math is better than chemistry and why you choose to teach chemistry but not math?', 'describe about yourself.' and finally 'anything to ask us?'

thanks God!!! then, i asked them how and when i can know the result. they told me : " WE ALSO DUNNO."

@_@

then, i took my belongings, said thank you, started my car and bye bye, Kuantan......




Wednesday, May 19, 2010

today

today i just read through all my posts whether blogger and friendster's blog. (now i didn't use friendster anymore.) i realise that my blog is getting boring and quite negative. i wonder why i will become like this....

can anyone please tell me why???

is it the time for me to change the way i thinking????

today

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

my grandmother...

yesterday about 1500, my grandmother finished her throat surgery.

actually months ago, she already felt some pain around her neck. when she eats, drinks and swallow, she will feels pain. so, she decided to come Temerloh and seek for doctor. the doctor told her that some sarcomas were growth along her throat. it's quite risky for her if my grandmother wants to remove it because she already 78 years old (actually she is 80 years old). i'm worry her health. although she dun have high blood pressure, diabetes and other sickness, but she is very old. she cannot recover as fast as us, teenagers.

before go into the operating room, she was so scare. she was cried....
the night before she go to hospital, she cannot sleep...

AND now, she is lying on th bed. the operation is success.

May God bless her... my grandmother

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Medsi

after passed the 1st part of medsi (objective questions) , now i will hav my 2nd part of medsi (interview) at Kuantan on 20th May.

frankly, i was so surprise when i know that i got the Medsi interview. i just simply answered the questions and i didn't bring some much hope on it. But, i'm very happy, not because of i'm selected, it's because i can go Kuantan. resting at home sometime will feel very boring.

my ambition is not a teacher and everyone knows that, but most of the people surrounding me trying to persuade me go and be a teacher especially my mum. when she knew that i got apply the UPSI to be a chemistry teacher, she was so happy. everyday she told the advantages to be a teacher, tell all her friends that i got apply to be a teacher, likes i didn't apply other courses but education. she also thinking to find the what Saifuddin to ask him write a recommend letter for me. this really makes me feel annoying. by the way, she's my mum, what can i say???

actually i'm still ok IF i selected, i'm like to teach people and i like to communicate with people. the bad news is all my friends dislike the way i teach them. some will hate me after i teach them because sometime i'm quite hot temper. if can, i want some more challenge job. Hire=Fire and i don't care. i want to learn more. i want to travel the world and see different things.

sigh... now waiting the day comes

Sunday, May 9, 2010

my cousin's wedding

actually i'm not very close with my father's side cousin. some of them are very quite and some of they are very 'la la', but the similarity is we seldom contact with each other. everytimes i get back to my grandmum's house, i also totally didn't chat with them because they seem like not interested to chat with me.

however, this time i went back to Sungai Ruan is for my cousin's wedding (堂哥). what i know the whole process are drinking and eating. so, i also follow them eat and drink. the different is they drink alcohol and i drink mineral water, they eat meat and i prefer vegetable. what is the worst for me is that there is not much vegetable for me...

it was a tiring day... if got next time, please don't call me....

Thursday, May 6, 2010

today is Juan's birthday

first thing i have to do is congratulate Miss Leow Li Juan is officially 20 years old.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

yesterday already 'belanja' her a toast bread at "Old Town" as her birthday cake. Ha ha ha... Wan Chin also bring her son comes out. Her son is super active. after we finished our drinks and foods, then we went to Wan Chin' house continue our chat.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

frankly, it's very warm when there is somebody remember your birthday. just a few of simple wishes are enough to brighten up our day. at least, it proves that you are somebody inside their heart. cake and presents are nothing if compare with the sincere wishes from family and friends.

remember, on your birthday your mother had used all her effort to bring to you to this fancy world. so, when your birthday, you can try to present your mother a bunch of flowers and say thank you.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

now is very hot

i got nothing to do and don't know what to do next....

BUT,

it has been a long time i din't write blog and yet i still don't what should i write. now, my life is so plain and got nothing to tell you all.

MAYBE,

my next post will describe my genting friends.... Hmmm

Saturday, May 1, 2010

since i dunno how to continue the story, i'm stop it.
so... sorry ar

Thursday, April 22, 2010

两个我

很多人都不知道我有双重人格,我也一直隐瞒着所有人。这毕竟不是件光彩的事情。我怕万一这秘密被人发现,下次你要见我就要来 Tanjung Rambutan 了。那时候,我穿着白色的衣,白色的裤,双手被缚,坐在五脚基,空白的眼神望着远方,一边流着口水,一边傻笑着。然后,一个超肥的护士很粗鲁地灌我吃那些五颜六色的神经病药。过后,我就狂呕出药来。肥护士就开始轮到她发疯,拿起超粗的针筒,向我刺。最可怕的是我不知道这肥婆是真的护士还是另一个疯子,不!是肥疯子!!

幸好的是另一个我也赞成问我这想法,不然,我会和他/她同归于尽!!!

咦,我有胡扯到哪里去了???

哈!我何时发现自己有双重人格???

不知道是不是上帝和我开了一个玩笑?我那超吝啬的爸爸在我17岁生日那天送我一部 Window 95 手提电脑 。我当时很用力,很用力地敲了我爸的头一下。想不到,他会喊痛嘞!我还以为他喝超便宜椰花酒喝醉了,然后不是到从哪里,很顺手的,拿了一部不用钱买的手提电脑,就很随便地给了我。这证明了我爸没有醉,也证实他没神经病,还非常确定我没在做梦。因为我爸超清醒地,非常正常地凑了我一顿。

忽然之间,我发现我吝啬的爸爸一丁点儿也不吝啬。在我生日当晚,他连送我两份礼物。平时,他话也懒得和我说,因为他要省口水。那晚,他竟然会用力的打我!!!然后,狠狠地将电脑甩出去(还好,我接着。这又证明了我运动神经好!)。我超开心的!那难忘的一夜,就算我快要死了,我都会随便抓一个人,告诉他我爸是多么地爱我。

拿到一部电脑当然要好好利用它啊!可惜的是,我家没有电话,更不用说我要上网。我妈说,看不到对方说话很没真实感,索性不安电话。有什么事就等遇到对方才说。急事嘛,可以和邻居街电话。再不然,可以去打公共电话。我的妈和我爸一样,爱省钱。

我唯一能够做的是乖乖的用它来做功课,写日记和玩一些超闷的游戏。

平安无事地就这样过了一个礼拜/出现了!!!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

count-downing my birthday

see? another cute and smart baby comes to this fancy world...


he likes to bath and enjoying being a nude model.


sometime, he also very emo.


beside him are his parents and friend (also neighbor), irene.

soon, his mum brang him a brother and a sister. they are so damn cute!!!

don't know from which year, he getting fatter, fatter and fatter.

when he was standard six, he got a nickname "watermelon" because of he was too "round".

when he was form 3, his face was liked a pig.... T.T


when he was form 5, he was the fattest among the classmates. sigh....

when he went to PLKN, he so determined to cut down his weight. of course, he met a bunch of good friends... ^^~

although they were wearing uniform, he was so stood out among the handsomes. what to do? hahaha

he was celebrating CNY when tuition.

first time, his friends celebrated his birthday with him. at that moment, he felt damn touched.

his form six gang. 6AS1

suddenly, he lost his mind and went to Genting to become a croupier. maybe this is his fate, he met a lot of kind-hearted friends. so, he never feel regret to become a croupier.

now, he is resigned already and enjoying jobless life. YEAH....

simply write

The first 18 days were training problem. I was chosen to be a roulette dealer. Frankly, I was no very happy when I know that I’m in the roulette group. Actually I want to be a baccarat dealer. However, it’s my fate, I have to accept it and it began my 18 days of hell.

Training is not very easy and not very tough, but everyone was so tension. People leave before the training end. Many friends’ sick included me. Many friends cried. Everyone was so tried. But all of these didn’t affect our determination to become a dealer in Casino de Genting. Everyone was working so hard. We encouraged each other and our bonds become stronger and stronger.

After the training, we started to work in the casino. At first, we were so scared. We all were afraid that we will make mistakes when dealing game. We scared we will do wrong payment, we scared we will forget the procedures, we scared we will forget to show clear hand and the list going on. However, after two weeks time, we become more confident and professional. We have no more fear to dealing the game.

The tests only begin here. The difficult PS, the trouble customers and the rude dealers started to test us. They keeping make our mood down. They show no mercy to us. They torture us every single day. Some of us cried because of the idiot PS’s attitude and behavior or the scolding from customers. Never mind, we never surrender to these stresses. We keep our fighting spirit on and never give up. Because of we know that we need RM1500 and there is no else more important than RM1500.

After two months, I resigned. I’m no more a croupier. I packed my begs and go back home. My body is giving warning to me. So, for my health, I choose go back home before the contract end.

HOME SWEET HOME

Saturday, April 17, 2010

currently enjoying my life...

yes, i'm relaxing at my home sweet home. everyday helping my parents do some house chores. i really like nothing to worry life. But some how i'll miss my genitng friends, they the best!!!

yesterday just went to KL for the PC fair. it got nothing to see but laptop, because i want to buy a new laptop... met Win and Rey. go lepak with them.. hahaha

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

resigned again

guess what? i resigned again! this time, i break my record. i just do this job for 1 day only.
next day morning, i phoned my head and inform her that i don't want to do anymore.

now, i'm jobless again......

Monday, April 5, 2010

new job

frankly, this job is easy. this job is just sit on the chair and do the things i have to do.

BUT

i dunno anything related to account. i'm a science student. i study phy, chemis, math and pengajian am. SEE! don't have account! but the job i'm doing is in an accountant company. God! help me!!! should i quite??? again....

the salary is rm600. 1 day i have to work 8 hours excluded lunch time, on saturday i have to work 5 hours and sunday is off day.

dunno why... i don't to do this job but got a voice from deep inside my heart says to me. "boy, you cannot give up so easily. never try, never know. maybe later you can manage this job. at least, you do this job for a month. after the personal income tax month, the most busy period pass already, only you resign. this is my responsible boy."

should i follow it???

Sunday, April 4, 2010

back from genting

since i resigned, i thought i can rest about half of a month. unfortunately, my mother get me a job in no time. tomorrow i will be an office boy in an accountancy. although the salary is very low if compares with the salary of a croupier, but at least i not needed facing customers can sit when working and most important i finally have a normal life.

frankly, i want to be a waiter. i want to feel the feeling of a waiter. my family are strongly disagree with my idea. their reason is my body is not very strong, easily get sick and they don't want to see me keep losing my weight. what can i do but follow their advise.

i also changed my phone already. from nokia 5300 to nokia N85. i know N85 is an old model, but it's very useful and the price is very cheap. i just bought it with RM980 only. the phone has all the functions i want and it is a slide phone!!! :-)

bye... that's all for today!

Friday, April 2, 2010

resigned

i'm resigned already. i'm not a croupier anymore. 31/3/2010 is my last day and today i'm at home resting. so, i'm in Mentakab now. who want to meet me just sms me, sure i'll come out.

i think is the time for me to explain why i'll resign so sudden.

frankly, i don't like this job. days to days, i sick of this life. just sleep and work only. life becomes so meaningless. i hate this feeling. my life shouldn't be like this. it should be more interesting and more colourful. i hate this black and white lifestyle.

besides, i still cannot use to the weather at genting. cold weather is not for me. i always get sick. sore throat, flu, muscle cramp, high fever and etc. i lost 2 kg already. my friends told me that my face is so pale. my hands and feet always feel cold. i think warm environment is more for me.

yes, sure i'll miss my friends there. although just know them for about 2 and 1/2 months, sincerely i treat them as my brother, especially Danny and Johnney. both of them are my roommates. i think when i'm free sure i will go Ipoh and pay them a visit. hope they won't feel boring without me. lol

besides friends, there is nothing else i miss in genting. that's the main reason i can take the resign decision so sudden.

ok, that's my answer. satisfy???

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

working

working as a croupier is very not easy.
many mistakes i made and i learnt from it.
from a know-nothing junior becomes a can-do junior.

met different of customers and pit supervisors. sometime PS really make me piss off, but what can i do? i'm just a temporary junior. all i can do is try my best to satisfy what they want. 8 hours working, 8 hours facing them. dealing with customers is not very hard, cooperate with PS is quite difficult for me. no wonder all my friends said that is doesn't matter dealing what games, the matter is the PS must a easy person. if not, we will suffer.

because of what we touching is money, show clear hands is very important step.
because of money is under my hands, when doing buying and payments, i must be very conscious and careful.
because of these, sometime i feel pressure.

standing for 8 hours, my legs feel pain. sure i won't take OT.
working a month only have 5 days holiday, sure i won't take WOL.
my private time is more important than money.
i rather lying on bed and listen to music.
do you agree with me???


Thursday, February 25, 2010

STPM result released!!

because of 25 Feb, this very important day, i just slept 4 hours.
because of 25 Feb, i applied forward my leave in next month.
because of 25 Fed, i went to find A/M for his approval 2330.

0930 bus arrived Genting, i started my journey to take my result.

once i out of the bus, without hesitate, i walked to school.
after about 4 hours (including the time in bus and time walk to school), finally i stood in front of school. the next minutes, the result will in my hand.

what the heck!!! before i take my result, i forced to fill up a stupid 'soal selidik' which full with bull shitting questions. i just scanned through it and simply answered these questions. the most important, i want my result! that's why i apply leave and come so far from Genting back to mentakab.

Cikgu Khalid, my class teacher. he helped to tear my envelope and gave to me. suddenly, i have no guts to open my result. Seng Sir, my phy teacher, he sat beside me. then, i asked him to help me open my result. he took my result, hit on the envelope 3 times and said "ONG! ONG! ONG!"
AND MY RESULT IS




WOW!!! i was damn damn shock and surprise!!! i didn't think that i can score this result. really out of expectation. all the teachers congrats to me. they wanted me to 'belanja' them go buffet. i just asked them go Casino and find me, i sure let them win. ha ha ha....

then, i went to find teachers 1 by 1 to thank them for the teaching. i also called my chemistry tuition teacher to thank her also. later, i sms to my best friends to share this good news with them.

today really really a good day. it deleted all my suffer memories in Genting... hahaha

Saturday, February 6, 2010

random... (bout my trainer and group members)

yes, i'm lazy. i lazy to continue my Genting diary. please forgive my laziness.

make it short, days in Genting = suffer+fun+excited+friendship+sad+angry+frustrated

so many emotions, how to describe all my feeling in a post??? right? furthermore, next day, Sunday, i'll go back to Genting. actually i will start my work on Monday 2000, but i don't want, it's too tiring.

erm... talk about my trainer first, Mr. Sangar A (88001949)

he is a very strict trainer. everytime he teaches, he will makes sure everyone is understand what he said. no matter how stupid is the question, he also will try his best to satisfy our curiousity. he always says :" if you didn't follow what i want, i'll terminate you." but we all know, he just don't want we too relax until forget that we are in training. to ensure we have do our homeworks, before he starts the training, he always gives us test. to make sure our grooming is 100%, everyday he will check our outfit, hairstyle, lipstick( girls only).

actually the first few days, i felt damn suffer. i failed him a couple of times. just because of i don't like people look down on me, i tried my best to complete his requirements, but my health kept pulling me down. days after days, i found that Mr. Sangar is a very cute guy also. then, i started to use with his training style. frankly, i quite like him.

then, is my team-mates
my group has ME, mun huey, tiffany, khoon and Uma.

Uma quited before we passing out. because of his high fever, he took 2 days MC and finally he forced to send to downtown hospital. i quite shock when i received this news. i thought he will be better after take some medicines and rest. the last time i saw him is when i was on the way to canteen. when i saw him, he still able to say hello to me. sad is the only word i can say. my group became 4 persons.

Tiffany is the weakest in our group. our trainer is so worry about her. she cannot handle pressure well, she cannot faces to the crowd. she cried a few times when we were in training. Mr. Sangar asked help from other AM to help Tiffany. they lend her a hand and gave her some test. luckily, they said Tiffany is ok but sometime not confidence with herself and too nervous. as a group member, we tried to help her. thanks to God, at the end, she becomes stronger and not easily to let her tears down.

Mun Huey. Hmmmm, i don't know what should i comment about this unique girl. tough? no, sometime her heart can be so brittle. funny? maybe? sometime she is very sensitive. But most of the time, she will smile and bring laughter to everyone. she is a very cairng girl. she always take care people. she worked at pharmacy, she always help us check the medicine before we take it. i still remember when i was having sore throat, she brang me some sore throat medicines. so kind-hearted, right?
(i think two of my roommates are crazy of her, althought they don't admit it.)

Khoon is a very silent boy. he is a quick learner. he always teaches my group members about what the trainer taught. he is more suitable to teach than me. you know why. he doesn't like to show his feeling to others. i seldom see him smile. i didn't see him sad before. he is a mistery to me. hahaha. never mind, he just stays next door. plus, he is same group with me. i still got lots of time to know about him.

K... lazy again. Bye

Thursday, February 4, 2010

days at genting

13/1/2010
finally, i'm at genting already. Jobless life ends here. YEAH!!! today just waiting for the registration and tomorrow will have an orientation. no doubt, the orientation sure damn boring. hope i can cope with it. oh ya, forget to mention that today also my first time drive car to genting. quite fun!!!

14/1/2010
the orientation supposes starts on 0900, but they let me waiting for 2 hours!!! after that, they asked us to go rest. what the heck!!! waste my time only.
went to GYM with my roommates. the facilities in there quite old already. never mind, i enjoyed myself.
had a call with Lily, feel so regret that i couldn't go to BC's birthday party.

15/1/2010
so many procedures to complete a thing in genting. so troublesome. couldn't they just simplify the steps. it's easy for them do their works and easy for me.
today is my first time doing laundry. khoon and me went to RSC 2 laundry room. it almost took me 2.30 hours in their. around 1.30 hours was waiting for our turn to do the laundry. same time, we also took this chance to learn how to use the machine and chatted with each other.

16/1/2010
met a lot of STPM students. they always ask how was my STPM. please don't ask me, ok? what is passed, then let it go.
just took my 'new' uniform form PSO. frankly, they should buy new uniform already. but the shirts are perfectly fit my body.
1730 till 0200 training. learnt a lot of things and have homeworks to be done. GOD....

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

training days at genting

seriously, training is not easy. since the first day, my body is not very well. plus the weather at genting is quite cold, it makes my health worse. now, i'm complete my training and on leave, but i'm still having flu and cough. next monday or this sunday, i will go back to genting.

if you want to know, the games i learnt are roulette, tai-sai, french boule and mini dice. my weakness is roulette, calculation. you know, since so many years i do math with calculator, now without calcualtor really a headache for me. sigh.

this training really gains me a lot of different experince and i meet many friends. now, i'm still feeling tired, lazy to write so much. i let you all see the photos first, later i'll brief more in my next blog, k?